Anxiety is nondiscriminatory when it comes to who will be afflicted. The definition of anxiety: An uneasy feeling of discomfort or dread accompanied by a feeling of apprehension and possible danger as per medical interpretation. It may be a slight or quite scary feeling of being uncomfortable due to a perceived threat. That threat may appear as physical, mental, or emotional. The feelings may escalate to an increase in heart rate, dizziness, shortness of breath, a nonexistent but true feeling of a lump in the throat, a choking sensation, blurred vision, numbness and/or tingling in hands, head, and scalp. Most of the time anxiety appears randomly and is not due to any specific stimuli such as someone attacking you in the middle of the night. One can even be suddenly awakened in the middle of their sleep with a feeling of not being able to catch their breath. At times like this if it hasn’t happened before the person believes they are having a heart attack. Focused on the fear of dying they become even more short of breath as they hyperventilate causing dizziness, feeling faint, and they may even experience chest discomfort.
Anxiety can start at a very early age with children as young as toddlers. If they are thrust into unfamiliar surroundings such as daycare, they may experience separation anxiety. This may happen especially if they have been primarily with a parent for a significant amount of time before going off to be cared for by strangers. Some children adjust more readily and others are scared and lonely, and even depressed when the parent leaves even for short periods of time.
I recall my own experience as a child where I immediately was missing my mother when she wasn’t home especially during the nighttime hours. The daytime seemed less scary but as soon as the curtains on the sun were drawn I felt too afraid to be without her. Crying wasn’t always the way for me to get attention but whining, pulling at my mothers arms, pouting, and even pretending to be sick got her attention. When I did all these things I knew she would respond somehow so as not to leave me with a babysitter. It didn’t always work. At the time I didn’t appreciate my mother (who was a widow when I was five) needing some time to herself or perhaps had demands placed upon her by relatives, friends, and neighbors who needed her help from time to time; meaning I needed to stay home. Telling her I was sick wasn’t really a lie; I did feel ill; really ill as if I would get rid of supper in a second if it meant she would stay home. I had frequent “stomach aches” that actually hurt and today I know that it was anxiety as it related to her departure.
We all need outlets to relieve anxiety whenever it does occur. Not knowing why I was feeling that way then, I know today that when I slept in her bed while she was gone I had more of a sense of calm until she returned. There were times at school especially in the early years when I would be called up by Sister to process some work on the blackboard that I would nearly wet my pants. This can’t be happening; I know the answer but all the other kids are going to laugh at me for some reason I had conjured up in my head. Sister would not allow them to provoke me or laugh but in my mind, I couldn’t be up there in front of them all so they could possibly point fingers at me. Even if it wasn’t true that there wouldn’t be a forced encounter of all eyes upon me I still could feel my chest tightening, my voice lowering, and my hands sweating. Certainly, at that age, I had no idea anxiety was starting to cook in my veins and arteries and make my blood pressure go up, my face to turn red, and my body to feel limp. As my life went on there were more than simple trips to the blackboard that would unleash a whole new distorted view of anxiety, depression, and loneliness that would play havoc with my life to this very day.
More to come on how to temper anxiety due to the fact that it is a part of our world, but we can’t allow it to detract us from living a good life.
